When Guys Go Grocery Shopping

Let me break it down for you. When I go shopping at say, Target, I walk in and immediately gravitate towards either a) the women’s clothing section to the left or b) the costume jewelry to the right. If I choose the path right, I spend a few minutes in the jewelry section and start to move on — until wait! I am captivated by the end cap of fancy notebooks or Essie’s newest nail polish collection or squeaky toys for The Bear. And so the process continues. My shiny object syndrome kicks in at every corner and before I know it, I’ve somehow abandoned my shopping list to the deepest depths of my purse.

Guys, on the other hand, are a different story. My husband, in particular, has become accustomed to the process of steering me away from every aisle and end cap in sight. His trips to most stores are so focused and pressed for time that there’s no temptation to stop and shop. It’s more like get and go.

But there is one exception. I noticed it tonight when we were at the grocery store. The only time he ever falls for shiny object syndrome’s spell is when it comes to… the beer aisle. (Or in his case, it’s more like the beer isle. A paradise in the middle of the grocery store.)

See him there? It is pretty much the only aisle he will stroll through. You’ll never see him taking his time in any other aisle. And it literally is window shopping, his eyes locked on every beer label, bottle cap, pop tab and tall boy chilling to his delight behind those glass doors. And if you look closely, he has a smile on his face the whole time. So it makes me wonder, why can’t he be this chipper in the produce section?

My only rationale is that beer can do strange things to people. But I will say, it’s kind of cute to see Mikey all bright-eyed in beer heaven. I guess you could say it’s the equivalent of seeing a kid in a candy store. And because of this, I think we’ll now understand each other a bit better. Like every time I fall into a shopping trance, I can tell him to compare it to every time he zones out in the beer section. See, it’s all about putting yourself in the other person’s shoes — whether they’re meant for long, leisurely walks through the beer aisle or a new pair of peep-toe pumps you’re thinking of adding to your collection.

So yeah, that’s the extent of my guys vs. girls analysis. It may not be groundbreaking, but you can’t deny its truth!


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